Moving blues

Why is it that no matter how much stuff we have, it’s still too much? And how come moving is so stressful, even when it’s a move in the right direction?

Yesterday we spent the day packing up a trailer full of my son’s belongings so he could move to a different state. It was stressful.

Ed and his moving truck – 1920’s

Today, we are hitting the road to drive the truck and trailer to his new home.

I’m excited, I’m tired and I’m a little sad.

I’m excited he gets to start over in a new place that will fit his personality better. And I’m tired from trying to Tetris all of his belongings into a trailer that was just a tad bit too small.

But I’m also a little sad.

Life has been stressful for my son for nearly two years now, and I’ve watched him deal with chronic pain. I wish I could wave a magic wand and make it all go away, but I can’t.

And, as a parent, that sucks.

We all have to deal with the things life throws at us, and I’m okay doing that when it comes to me. I just wish I didn’t have to watch my kid deal with it.

But I learned a long time ago, I can’t wrap my kids in cotton and protect them from the world. Bumps and setbacks and even really shitty things happen, to most of us. And we have to just deal with it.

So I’m sad that he has to deal with it, but I’m also sad to see him move so far away. Besides John, he is my only friend in Santa Barbara. When John is gone for work, I could always call my son and see if he wanted to meet for lunch or go to a movie with me.

I won’t have that now.

But maybe that’s okay too. I am terrible at making new friends, and maybe this will force me to put myself out there and find more local friends. It will be interesting to see how my life changes, as well as his.

So for now, I’ll concentrate on the road ahead and do my best to keep the moving blues at bay.

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