Hair, there and everywhere

I’ve been thinking about what to do with my hair lately. I do this a lot. Let it grow (go) and before I know it, it’s pretty long and unmanageable. Then I go to the opposite direction and cut it all off.

One time I even cut it myself.

That was a few years ago when I decided I should quit dying my hair and let it go back to natural. I only did this because I envisioned long beautiful gray hair. And being the impatient sort, I didn’t want to see a bunch of long dyed hair at the bottom, and my new amazing gray hair at the top.

So I chopped it off.

Um, remind me not to do that again please

And then I waited for my new silver strands to take over. Only they didn’t. Turns out, I don’t have much gray and even less silver. No, mine was what I like to call “dishwater blonde”. Nope.

Me with my best friend. This is the best my hair looked “natural”

I was so happy the day I went to my hairdresser and said, “dye it”. She was happy too.

I’ve had long hair most of my life. At 16 it was down to my waist. I got tired of it, so I asked my sister to cut it and give me a perm. Talk about a difference. Wow.

16 years old, just moments before getting my hair cut
A few years later – still with permed hair!

That may have started my need to change things up.

I was blonde as a kid, and into adulthood.

Little blonde me


My hair started coming in darker

But after having kids, I noticed my hair started getting darker and darker. Back then, in the early ‘90’s I was getting highlights to keep it blonde, but then one day, out of the blue as I was sitting in the chair at my hairdresser’s, I said, “Dye it red”.


I forgot in that moment that red and yellow make orange. Which is closer to describing the color than red. Boy did I shock my family and friends with that one! Wow.

What in the world was I thinking?

I ended up going to the coast with some girlfriends the very next day and when I woke up the next morning and looked in the mirror, I screamed. They laughed but said they loved my new hair and thought I was brave to change it up.

But I’m not really that brave when it comes to my hair. I’ve never dyed it purple, or got one of those isometric cuts. I’ve never tried dreads or anything too trendy.

Still, I’ve been trying to decide if it’s time to shake things up a bit. Maybe I should just go get a trim before I do anything too drastic? What do you think?

John took this one today

Reader Comments

    • Loretta Sayers
      Loretta Sayers

      Good call Carrie. I actually dye my roots dark…it just bleaches out so quickly in the sun. I do need a trim. I meant to get one in December, but then all hell broke lose with the fires. Time to make an appointment!

  1. littlemissw

    I think the short hair looked nice on you. I’ve pretty much had a pixie-cut since I was 15, I’m 33 now. I did grow it when my sister got married and when I got married but it wasn’t past shoulder length.

    I do think long hair looks lovely on you though. If it’s feeling a bit heavy, what about some layers?

    • Loretta Sayers
      Loretta Sayers

      Ha! My mom gave me a pixie when I was in 4th grade and I hated it! I think that’s one of the reasons I gravitate towards long hair. But, you’re right, I need some layers! Thanks Wendy.

  2. Mary D.

    I think your hair looks great! I can sure relate to nearly everything you said (odd colors, perms, and I still cut mine occasionally!)
    I wonder why hair gets darker after having children? My hair was always a reddish brown until I had kids and it went chocolate brown (almost black!) Must be a hormonal thing.
    I am changing things up this year as a gift to myself in anticipation of my 60th birthday next Jan. I have been coloring my hair to cover grays since my late 20’s or early 30’s! I decided when I turn 60, I will finally quit worrying about looking old. I am old so I’m going to celebrate it and welcome it with a full head of gray hair. That is if I can just get through this horrible skunk look I have going on now! I did buy a box of dye in case I can’t take it any longer….
    You have a young face so most everything will look great on you! Wouldn’t it be nice at our age if we had a cut and color that we loved and we never wanted to change it? You know those ladies who have a classic style that when you see them it looks the same as it did 30 years ago and it looks great and it is them!!

    • Loretta Sayers
      Loretta Sayers

      Good for you Mary! I was truly surprised when I had very little grey hair! I hope it goes silver some day…and when it does, I won’t color it.

      You will be turning 60 five months before me! Here we go!! yay!

  3. Dena

    Nice to see the 16 year old I remember and you look beautiful with all your hair styles. I color my hair and wear it long because I like the way it looks. I thought about getting some purple under the blond in the back which looks great initially but after a while it just looks kind of tired and faded so I just stick with my dyed blond.

  4. Trisha

    Two years and one month ago, I ditched the dye and joined ‘The Grey Revolution’. Actually, I didn’t know there was such a thing until after I made my decision. When I told my husband what I wanted to do, he was fully supportive and encouraging. And so it began. My hair was a few inches past my shoulders and I decided to keep the length. As the weeks went on and my new color began to show, I ended up wearing my hair up and back – which became ‘the style’ for me because it was the only way the new color blended with the old, and it looked less drastic as my hair color changed. It was a very long, drawn out process. I wasn’t sure what my colors would be, but by six months in, I could definitely tell. I had silver on the sides, some silver on the top, and the rest of my hair was several shades of brown. I could see the brown colors in my close-up mirror, and they were really pretty , but in the regular mirror, they looked mostly like dark brown (with some silver strands here and there). Months went by and I had a love/hate relationship with my hair. I loved that I didn’t have to mess with hair coloring. I loved saving the money it costs to dye it. I hated how it looked some days. I loved how it looked other days. A year went by and I still had a long way to go. At that point, I had it cut to about shoulder length, to get a lot of the old color off. But I knew it would be a long time before it would be all natural. As the second year went by, and especially nearing the end of the second year, my hair was changed. No longer a (colored) pretty brown with reddish highlights, it was what I called ‘multi-colored’… except for the silver/white on the sides and through the top. Every time I looked at myself in the mirror, I wondered who was looking back. Some days it just looked like old hair. I wasn’t sure if it was all in my head (no pun intended) but I couldn’t shake the feeling if discontent. Contrary to what others in the ‘Grey Revolution’ say, I felt it made me look older. I really struggled with what to do because I had worked so long and hard to grow it out. After much thought, I ended up getting it cut again, just above shoulder-length, with some long layers, and was happy I finally had a ‘style’. But oh, I forgot to say…. My hair has been board straight my whole life. And like you, Loretta, I had very long hair in my teen years – to the middle of my back. But now, not only was my natural color so different than what I thought it would be – my hair developed curls!! Yup! Curls!! Haha.. go figure. If I scrunch it while it is wet, and let it air dry, it’s curly. If I blew it dry, it would take some of the curl out, and I could use my curling iron to give it softer waves that would keep. I loved the length with layers, but I still didn’t like my natural colors. After agonizing about it, I finally decided I would buy some semi-permanent color at Sallys Beauty Supply and color it myself (as I have done in the past). After all, semi-permanent washes out, so I felt it would be a safe choice. I picked a ‘brown wine’ which was supposed to be brown with red highlights… they even had a hair swatch to show what it would look like. I thought, if I use a semi-permanent color, and didn’t like it, it would wash out in about a month (if I washed my hair every day!). So I did it. And guess what? It turned out ORANGE!!! I kid you not. I was so shocked. My husband said he liked it (he’s such a sweetheart) but I did not. So I went back to the store and switched up to a chocolate brown demi-permanent. The demi was supposed to also wash out, eventually, but an employee of the store said “it might not wash out completely”. I didn’t care, I just wanted a color I liked and one that felt more like ‘me’. So I did it. And I loved it. Finally, after over two years of painstakingly growing out my ‘natural’ colors, I loved my hair again!

    The decision to grow out my hair’s natural colors is one I do not regret. I committed myself to do it, and I followed through with it. Not because others were, but because I had no idea it was a ‘thing’, but simply because I wanted to.

    I ended up finding and joining a few Grey groups on Facebook. I won’t name names. They were supportive and encouraging during my first year. But then, it seemed that so many women who were going grey (silver, platinum, or whatever colors they got) were obsessed with their hair. Some posted photos almost daily, even after their hair color was grown out. There were a lot of posts where they talked down about any woman who colored their hair, like those of us who went natural were better and wiser in some ways. I ended up leaving all of the Grey groups. The only support I cared about was my husband’s. When I told him I wanted to color my hair again, he said (as he always does) “You should do what YOU want, and what makes YOU happy. I would love you with grey hair, silver hair, red hair, or NO hair!”

    Sorry for taking up so much space writing this, but there’s no shorter version.

    When it comes to our looks – hair, makeup, clothes – WE have choices. We can and should do what makes US happy, because it’s our body, our life. I don’t know if and whether I will ever go natural again. Maybe when I’m 80. Maybe not. Maybe when I’m 80, I’ll color it purple and get a spiked hair cut. Hahaha… probably not, but I’m just saying… it’s nice to have choices!

    ~ Trisha

    • Loretta Sayers
      Loretta Sayers

      I love your comment Trisha!!! We had similar stories to tell for sure. Isn’t it great to have choices??

      I also noticed the grey groups….and felt the same thing you have. I think it’s interesting when the magazines show ladies with amazing silver hair, thinking that’s what we will all have if we just stop coloring our hair!

      Thanks for sharing your story.

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